


Sherlock Tries Minecraft

by thatjohnlock



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Minecraft, Silly boyfriends, Well...kind of fluff? I don't know. They're just cute boyfriends.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-16
Updated: 2014-11-16
Packaged: 2018-02-25 13:22:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2623241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatjohnlock/pseuds/thatjohnlock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The ever logical Sherlock Holmes becomes stumped by the illogical game of Minecraft, not before annoying John of course. </p><p>(Also, Sherlock runs off a cliff and John laughs at him.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sherlock Tries Minecraft

**Author's Note:**

> I love Minecraft and the idea of Sherlock playing it makes me laugh so much. I want to write another part to this fic where Sherlock is actually better at the game and he and John actually have a house and go on adventures and stuff. But, I dunno if I'll do it. I just think it would be fun :)
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading!

“Ok, the first thing you have to do is acquire wood.” John explains from the other side of the desk. Both he and Sherlock were seated in front of their laptops, with Minecraft running. John swiftly moved his character and already had an inventory of wooden planks and wheat seeds. Sherlock however was moving his character in stuttering pivots as he tried to get used to the controls. “Where are you going?”

John turns his character to watch Sherlock’s running off.

“Look at these bloody graphics, what year is this?” Sherlock spits.

“You’re walking off into the middle of nothingness.” John states. “We need to gather more resources before we can go exploring, Sherlock.”

“You have enough for both of us, I’m sure.” Sherlock’s character was running into the open space of a desert biome. John didn’t see any animals anywhere, so he was glad that he’d gathered a bit of wheat seeds, still...it wouldn’t grow soon enough to feed them.

Hopefully they’d pass a village of some sort. They could take the crops from there. And, hopefully there would be animals already trapped in the fencing at the back of some of the village homes.

“Stop sprinting, Sherlock. You’re going to deplete your food bar too quickly.”

“My what?”

“There is a bar of hearts, that’s your health.”

“It’s full.”

“Yeah, but there is another bar that has little mutton chops...or something. That’s your food.”

“Why does it matter that I’m sprinting?”

“It’s like real life, the more you run, the more calories you burn.” John says. “Only in the game, you have a food bar. When it’s high...if you get hurt it’ll help heal you. If it’s low, not only can you no longer sprint, but you also can’t heal and you’ll be more likely to die.”

“Oh.” Is all Sherlock says. “How do I eat?”

“Well, I was trying to build us some tools and then gather food back in the previous location. But you went sprinting into the middle of nowhere.”

“Why didn’t you stop me?” Sherlock asks, John looks up to see Sherlock’s brow furrowed.

“Tried to.” John reaches over and picks up his tea and takes a sip. “But like real life, getting you to do anything is impossible.”

Sherlock flickers his eyes up to look at John before he stopped his own character in game, turning it around and hitting John’s character.

“Ow, hey.” John backs his character away from Sherlock’s.

“Don’t be a prick, John.” Sherlock smirks, but he gasps when John’s character pulls out what looks like a weapon. “John, what are you going to do with that?? Put it away.”

“I’m going to shove this wooden pickaxe so far up your-”

“John, please.” Sherlock is laughing now, John too. “I’m sorry. Food me.”

“Food you?”

“My character is hungry, I think.” Sherlock looks at his food bar, some of the meats are gone.

“I don’t bloody have any, I told you that you didn’t give me any time to get any.”

“Oh, so now what?”

“Find animals, or we could farm.”

“Ooooh, let’s be farmers, John.”

“We can’t in the desert.” John shrugs. “Well, if you find water, we could mine under and see if we find dirt to dig up and then place to plant on.”

“I think...what the...is this an animal?” Sherlock asks, then he exclaims. “It is, it is! It’s a sheep! It made a ‘baah’ sound!”

“We can’t eat it.” John follows Sherlock’s character over to the pixilated animal. He watches as Sherlock attacks it.

“What? Nonsense.” Sherlock replies. “We can eat it. They have meat.”

“No, in the game, they are only good for wool.”

“Are you...what?” Sherlock says when the sheep gives a final ‘bah’ and falls over. Sherlock picks up the wool and frowns. “What do we need wool for? To make you ugly jumpers in the game?”

“Ha-bloody-ha, Sherlock.” John rolls his eyes. “No, to make beds in order to set our respawn location. And carpet for decoration.”

“Carpet?” Sherlock repeats. “Oh, we should make a house!”

“Oh my gosh, you want to do everything.” John groans. “But we don’t bloody have anything!”

“We have wool.”

“Yes, we have wool and that’s it.”

“So, we can make carpet.”

“How much carpet do you think one wool can make?” John looks over his laptop screen and at Sherlock. The detective looks up at John too before his face cracks into a ‘sheepish’ grin.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, exactly.” John rolls his eyes. “We need to start over. We should kill ourselves.”

“Bleak, John.”

“We’ll start off where we started, it’ll be better.” John says. “There will be trees for wood, and I saw some animals.”

“But, we can’t just give up now, John.” Sherlock turns his character. “I see some mountains that way.”

“Where?” John turns his character to look and he sees them as well.

“We could live up there.” Sherlock suggests.

“I don’t see any trees.” John says, but he already hears Sherlock’s character running across the desert biome towards the mountainous region.

“Come on, John!” Sherlock squeaks. “This is fun!”

“Is it?”

“Yeah, there are so many possibilities and-” Sherlock suddenly disappears from John’s view on the screen. “What?” Sherlock hears a horrible crunch sound and the words ‘You Died’ appear on the screen. John too sees the death notification on the bottom left corner of his screen.

“Well...always watch where you’re going, I guess.” John crouches his character so that it doesn’t fall off the cliff as well. He can see the one block of wool and one dot of XP where Sherlock had hit on his way to the bottom. John begins laughing.

“Where am I?” Sherlock moves his character in circles. “Joooohn, I’m all alone.”

“I’ll do myself in, so I can come to you, alright?”

“We’re like Titanic.” Sherlock comments.

“Because we’re all going down very quickly?”

“No, because of the ‘you jump, I jump’ we have going on.”

“Ah,” John nods before he flings his character over the edge. “Sherlooooock!” John cries as his characters falls to the bottom of the gaping hole.

Sherlock watches as John’s character appears in front of his own.

“John, you’re here!” Sherlock dances his character around John’s.

“Yes, I am.” John nods. “So, we need to have some rules.”

“Rules.” Sherlock nods, and picks up his tea and takes a swig.

“First, don’t run off.”

“Right.”

“That’s...kind of it. You didn’t do anything else wrong.”

“Good.” Sherlock smiles.

“Although, now we don’t have maps.”

“Why not?” Sherlock’s brow furrows. “Where is the map button?”

“There isn’t a ‘map’ button.” John shakes his head. “In Minecraft, maps are a physical inventory item.”

“Oh...we lost them when we-”

“Yes.”

“Well, that’s crap.” Sherlock frowns. “How will I know where you are, John?”

“If you don’t run off, it won’t be a problem. So stay close to me, alright?”

“I hear a pig.” Sherlock announces, moving his character to look around for it. “Oh! Can I go get it, John?”

“I’ll get it, you harvest wood.”

“How?”

“Punch it.”

“Pardon?”

“Punch the tree. You know how to punch, you hit me earlier.”

“You punch a tree to harvest wood? What kind of barbarians are we playing as?” Sherlock does as he’s told, though. Hitting the tree until a wood block appears in front of him. He can hear the sound of John attacking the pig in the background. “Can we breed animals? Maybe don’t kill it.”

“We can breed them, but we don’t have the right resources.” John explains, Sherlock hears one last ‘skree’. “Also it’s kind of too late not to kill it.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” John says. “But, on the bright side, Sherlock, I’ve got three uncooked pork chops.”

“Can we eat them uncooked?”

“It won’t fill as many food bars uncooked.”

“How do we cook it?”

“Furnace.”

“Oh, where’s that?”

“We have to make one.”

“How?”

“Make a wooden pickaxe, then get cobblestone.”

“What?”

“Mine smooth stone to get cobble stone and-”

“This is so complicated for a bunch of pixels.”

“Every game is a bunch of pixels, technically.”

“You know what I mean.” Sherlock leans away from his laptop. “Too much work.”

“So, you’re done?”

“No, I want to watch you build us a life, John.” Sherlock stretches, yawning. “Build us a house on a farm, then I’ll continue to play with you.”

“Like hell I am, you’re going to help.” John delivers Sherlock a soft kick under the desk.

“Ugh,” Sherlock rolls his eyes. “What should I do?”

“Here.” John gives Sherlock a wooden axe. “Chop down some more trees, then give me the wood.”

“What are you going to be doing?”

“Getting cobble stone, then making better stone tools.” John says. “Hopefully finding some iron, or a cave. A cave would be nice for some coal and stuff.”

“Cave?”

“Yeah.”

“For mining?”

“Well, yes.”

“I want to mine!”

“No, you’re gathering wood.”

“But-”

“I don’t want you in a cave until you can handle little things.” John says, as he makes his character begin digging through the dirt. Eventually, hitting smooth stone.

“Did you find iron yet?” Sherlock asks.

“No, I just started.” John replies.

“Too much work, and it’s not happening quickly enough.” Sherlock pouts. “You play this game all the time, and you make it seem like soooooo much fun. But, this is absolute bollocks.” Sherlock sits back and folds his arms. “I quit.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

John pulls his mobile from his pocket and ends the timer he’d been secretly running. Sherlock leans forward to peer at what John’s doing.

“What are you doing?” Sherlock raises one of his perfect brows.

“You lasted longer than I thought you would.” John says. “I’m a bit disappointed that we didn’t make it until night time. I would’ve loved to see you get shot in the arse by a skeleton.”

“What do you...” Sherlock sees the timer. “Oh, you...John!” He blushes.

John stands up and takes two short strides to Sherlock. “You did well, love.” He leans down and brings his mouth to Sherlock’s.

“I told you I’d try it...and I did.” Sherlock retorts, even though John had not really mocked him.

“You did, I’m proud.” John nods.

“You’re just saying that.”

“No, I mean it.” John lets go of Sherlock’s face. “Wanna go out to dinner?”

Sherlock eyes him before shutting his laptop. “Of course, John.”


End file.
